What makes us strong, has the power to make us weak.

This week has been hectic. Crazy, wild ride that has strained me in every possible way. But oxygencarbon dixoide is still coming out of my nose/mouth, I can still move my fingers and type, so I think I'm alive. :p

Recently, I've been thinking about friends and the whole concept of friendship. I don't know if it's because of the whole "Valentine's season", but it has left my mind literally boggled. I've realised something significantly major; no two friends are alike. All your friends are unique. You share different joys and burdens with different friends, everyone who is your 'friend' knows a different you. Some may know you as the person who grew up as a boy when you're really a girl, some may know you as the funny girl who splurt sentences with double meanings to no end, some see you as serious and work-oriented, and some know everything about you. It all depends on what and how much you share with that certain friend. ;)

That is what makes friendship so beautiful and unique. Maybe, I'm missing out on it, maybe I already have what I want, I just choose not to see it? I have friends who laugh at all my jokes obediently, I have friends I can share my hopes and worries with, I have friends who can motivate me, I have friends I can have a lot of fun with, I have a really special friend (or a pet, she prefers the term 'friend' though) who loves the crazy and imperfect me, and she's basically the best-est (I figured it's okay to go against English when it's for a good cause) friend anyone could dream of. :D

But there's one friend I think I'm missing. The friend that can make me giggle, not laugh. The friend that can make me blush, not bold. The friend that will be invited to my deepest, inner-most thoughts. The friend I can bother at any time of the day, and it's considered 'alright'. The one friend I can care for to an extreme, overprotective state. The friend I can be my wild self with, without any fear. I think there's a term for that, boyfriend? :D

It's probably the Valentine's season talking. I know I'm not ready for a boyfriend, but I'm definitely ready for a crush, or even a boy friend. Heehee, I think I'm confusing you now, brainiac. But, see, every girl likes the idea of liking a guy, any guy. It just makes her happier, admiring from a distance, maybe small conversations with him make her smile a wee bit more. I don't have that right now hehehe *hint hint* ;)

I've been crossing my fingers hoping one of my guy friends would take pity on me and invite me for a romantic candlelight friendly dinner on Monday. >:D
Okay, okay, be serious Parveen. Mommy asked me today if I had plans on Monday. I felt so horrible saying 'no', it's like she found out her daughter's a repellant to guys. *sprays* I don't smell bad! Hmph! >:(
What I really want is just something to make it feel like my first real Valentine's day, it doesn't have to be real for all I care. Heck, in fact, I don't want it to be real! Not everything has to be serious all the time. Maybe a movie or dinner, an exchange of gifts and AWESOMELY cheesy lines for that day? No feelings mixed, just fun and friendship! They do it so well in the Western world, we Asians are gullible when it comes to our emotions! D:
Haha, I even told Faisal my ideal Valentine's date would probably be a soccer match or something that silly. Something to make it feel like it was Valentine's for Parveen Kaur, and she didn't miss out while her other pretty friends were out enjoying the 'real thing'. I swear, when I find my guy best friend, I'm going to make sure he fulfills all these duties and brings me out to make me feel special. After all, isn't this "friends-only" Valentine's supposed to be mutual? The guy benefits from it too, right? :3

Mmm maybe I'm wrong. We'll just have to see if Monday's going to be this big girl's first celebrated Valentine's, or just another disappointment concealed by Valentine jokes. If you're a guy (it doesn't really matter if you're not "sure", as long as it's uncomfy when you try to cross your legs), and you have absolutely no plans on the evening of Valentine's, please consider a friendly no-strings-attached pretend-date with me? Heheheheh :$
I will get you something special, I'll ummm... dress up! I'll even wear a dress?! Not challenge you to arm-wrestling? Oh, oh, I will shower you with compliments! (HAHAHA Yong Ming, you're so handsome!) AND IF YOU'RE SO DAMN SHY OR EMBARRASSED ABOUT GOING OUT WITH ME EVEN IF IT'S PRETEND... we could keep it our little secret. Shhhhh! ;)
Hahaa, anything to make it special lah! It's probably too late, but that doesn't mean I'll secretly hope my phone vibrates (YES, IT'S ALWAYS ON SILENT, my mum has a problem with that, you also ah?!) and I see an invite *blush*...*still blushing*...*blushblushblush* ;D
Or else, my pre-Valentine date with a certain cow named Durga shall have to do. :p
YAY! Tomorrow we're going to study at the JP library first, and then go to the gym! Romantic much? ;)

Let's hope my phone does vibrate, and Monday becomes a special day in my history book. :$

With Love,