Welcome, mortal.

Friday, May 9, 2008

The time of our lives.

SALUT!
There's no school today! Whoohooo!

But this means I can't see MY Najmah, Qwerty, Char-Charmainee etc etc. (And the list goes on)
I'm not doing much, actually. I'm just waiting aimlessly, and the best part is, I don't even know what I'm waiting for! This is a process called life.

When are you going to do what you said you would? I'm still waiting for that day...
It's lyrics from a song. Unfortunately, I fogot the title. GAHHHHH.

"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away."
- Philip K. Dick

"When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth."
– George Bernard Shaw

Just felt like reading a quote. Next time you're free, be sure to Google some humorous and interesting quotations. I would recommend quotes that will have a lasting impression on you. For example, a good quote would be one that makes you smile, and then makes you think. George Bernard Shaw's, Mark Twain's and M.K. Gandhi's. Okay, I got the quote fever, not the QWERTS fever. ;D

Teacher: Boy, I told you to stand that the back of the line. Why did you cut the queue?
Pupil: But ma'am, someone was already standing there!

GAHAHAHAHA!

A man walks on the streets, smiling shyly. In his hand is a small note, and he keeps opening the note to read its contents. In it, it says:
"I love you too..." and yadda-yadda bullshit.
~~
Ten years later, the same man walks on the same street with yet another note in his hand. This time, his shoulders are slouched. He opens the note and in it, it says:
"One can of sardines, 2 kg of potatoes, three stalks of celery..."

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus,and drove off along the route.
No problems for the first few stops. A few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well.
At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on.
Six feet eight, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said,
"Big John doesn't pay!"
and sat down at the back.
Did I mention that the driver was five feet three, thin, and basically meek? Well, he was. :D
Naturally, he didn't argue with Big John, but he wasn't happy about it.
The next day the same thing happened -
Big John got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down.

And the next day, and the one after that, and so forth......
This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way
Big John was taking advantage of him. Finally he could stand it no longer.
He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff.
By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself.
So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got
on the bus and said,
"Big John doesn't pay!"
the driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed, "And why not?"
With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied,
"Big John has a bus pass."
Moral of the story:
Be sure there is a problem in the first place before working hard to solve one.

:D
Then there's educational humor! Oh gosh, I'm being such a nerdy geet.

Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born.
-
Man: Hey, if I post this letter vis your company, will it really reach Timbuktu?
Officer: Yes, sure. Why?
Man: I can guarantee you that it won't reach Timbuktu.
Officer: Sir, we give you full assurance that it will reach Timbuktu.
Man: I can bet you a million bucks that it won't reach Timbuktu.
Officer: Why not?
Man: 'Cos its addressed to Papua New Guinea!
-
Did you hear about the man who threw his wife down the 20-storey building in a fit of rage?
He was fined for killer litter.
-
For more of these jokes, go and Google. I can't give you any exact jokes website as there are thousands to consider! Haha, here a some:
http://www.littlefunny.com/Jokes.aspx
http://www.comedy-zone.net/jokes/work.htm
http://www.aboutteens.org/humor.htm

Time for me to say "au revoir" now. But before I do that, I'd like to find out how my blog readers feel about humor. You can tag and give your five cents worth. It may be called five cents, but to me, it'd be something interesting.
Also, if you find any quotes on humor you want to share, do this:
1: Write it on a piece of paper.
2: Proceed to your kitchen.
3: Light the gas and burn that paper.

Oh, I'm kidding. What I really meant was:
TAG!